Home

Well my time at home is almost at an end. I leave in 4 days. I have a lot of mixed feelings about leaving. On one hand I really really miss Bobby and I'm excited to see Tracy and tell her all about Amara, but on the other hand 2 weeks was not long enough to be home with my family. I'm going to miss all the baby love and the next time I see my family Amara will be a year old. She won't be a baby anymore! It's just so weird to think about how old she'll be the next time I see her. I think I'll really need to make it a priority to get internet at my place soon so that I can skype more often with my family. I didn't really realize just how much I had missed everyone until I came home and saw them all. I didn't realize how much I adore Amara and how much I've been missing and will continue to miss when I'm gone. Man, 8 months is a long time. It sort of stinks that Christmas didn't fall more in the middle of my time away from home. The amount of time I have left is twice as long as the amount of time that's already passed. At least I got some good rest in and I'm re energized.

Amara

I finally met my amazingly adorable niece!!!!!!!!! She's just so sweet and beautiful. I love all her little coos and faces and I'm just soaking up all her smiles and baby love. I'm so happy that I got to meet her and see her in her baby stage. I'm really sad that after this trip the next time I'll see her is when she's a year old.... Man that seems like such a long time!

I've really been enjoying being home. I love love LOVE hearing Lucy's little paws running around every morning. I love the snow (especially since it's not too cold!). I love the family love. It's been a really great trip. I think it's going to be really hard to leave again!

I think I've scarred Lucy for life. Whenever I get my coat on she gets super frantic and reaches up and wants me to pick her up and then she cries a little bit. Poor puppy... It's just like having a 3 year old... ha ha ha.... On Thursday I will be house/dog/cat sitting for Nate and Jenn for a couple of days. I'm looking forward to being able to relax and watch some good movies and eat junk food. I'm also really excited for Mickey's Diner with Dad and Eben and Jonno on Christmas morning!!!

Home Sweet Home

Well I made it back to Minnesota in one piece! I got in yesterday afternoon around 3:30. The cold is bearable so far and the snow is beautiful! I go to go to church and see some friends but the highlight of the day was finally meeting my niece Amara. It was so completely wonderful!!! Last night I slept on the couch with Lucy which was so nice. Although she did jump down and want to be let out at 1:30 am... and then while we were out there she wanted to play in the snow... So I put her in her kennel... Ha ha ha... But it was nice being woken up by her kissing my face. She's such a sweet puppy. I've missed her a lot... I can already tell that it's going to be hard to leave again. But I have a Bobby that I have to go back to Alabama for so I will cherish these Minnesota moments as much as possible.

Post Thanksgiving...

I had a lovely Thanksgiving! I went to Bobby's house and hung out with his family. His brothers have gotten a little more comfortable with me and their personalities are coming out a little more... Ha ha ha... Thanksgiving food in Alabama is mostly the same. The biggest difference is that the stuffing is made with cornbread so the texture is WAY different than I'm used to. It was good though. We had the usual turkey, sweet potatoes and rolls. We also had twice baked potatoes and homemade creamed corn and of course pie. We watched football and then skyped with my entire family which was super fun. It made me miss home, but at the same time I was happy to be able to celebrate with Bobby's family. On Sunday I was invited to celebrate Thanksgiving with Tracy's family. Oh my gosh. I love her family. They all made me feel so at home and I got so many hugs! My heart was just so full afterwards! The food was fantastic there as well. The stuffing had artichokes and cranberries in it and was to die for. Tracy's sister made this squash casserole with zucchini (I don't like squash OR zucchini) and it was so delicious! And we had coconut custard pie for dessert. So yummy.

December 9th will mark the 3 year anniversary of my friend Tiffany's death. I started getting nightmares of people that I love being killed in violent ways. I think it's because of the way that Tiffy was killed and it being that time of year. It's kind of hard going through it without my family/friends who knew her around me. My sister sent me a special package though so I'm excited to get that and see what sort of treasures she sent me :) I've been super bad at emails and everything, so if you've emailed me, sorry! I just haven't had time to get here to Starbucks to reply and I don't want to be here all night so I don't get all of them replied to. I do appreciate emails and FB messages. They remind me of home and make me feel like I'm being thought about :)

Thankful

After all that I've gone through over the past few months I have found that I have a lot to be thankful for. I'm thankful for my super supportive family. They're super awesome and have been my shoulder to cry on on many occasions. I'm thankful for Bobby who has been supporting my financially and emotionally. He's totally my rock and I couldn't get through this year without him and the laughter that he brings to the darkest of days that I've had here. He is amazing. I'm thankful for all of my friends who I know have been covering me with prayers. I'm thankful that I had/have a two parent family and that my parents believe in me and have always been there for me. I'm thankful for the public education that I received because not all public education is created equally. I'm thankful for all the amazing teachers that I had who knew how to teach and who knew how to capture my attention and who ruled out of love and never cruelty. I'm thankful for SPCC and all the amazing people who helped to shape the teacher that I have become. I'm thankful for Tracy and her amazingly compassionate heart. Without her I'm pretty sure this whole experience would be very different.There are too many blessings in my life to even have the words to name. All I know is that I am so very fortunate and having a full life does not in any way mean that you have to have a lot of money or a lot of material possessions. Having a full life is all about the people that you surround yourself by. I have amazing people in my life and I love every one of them and every one of them has helped to shape me into the person that I am now and for that I am so thankful. Love you all and I can't wait to see everyone when I come home for Christmas! (I'll miss you Bobby!!!)

Roaches

So this week I found out that the south has a roach problem. Tracy was telling me that in the cities in the south they get roaches the way that we get mice in MN. Here it's seen as really weird that I'd never seen  a real roach until I went to Nicaragua (and it's funny that I'd never seen a roach until last June, but now I've had 2 of them TOUCH me.... YUCK!) Anyways, on Wednesday I got to the school and I sat at my desk (which is up against the wall, in a corner by the door). I was sitting there waiting for the day to begin and enjoying the quiet and empty room. I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye and looked up at the door. There was a cockroach walking up the door. I froze. I didn't really know what to do since they're nearly impossible to kill. I sat and watched it walk up the door. Then it finally stopped at the top of he door frame. I decided I should do something about it since Tracy could walk in at any moment and the roach would fall on her head if she did. I didn't know what to do though so I pulled out my phone to text Bobby. I was looking at my phone when all of a sudden the roach came FLYING at my head. I jumped up, threw everything that I had in my hands and ran screaming to the middle of the room. My heart was pounding and holy cow did I get a rush of adrenaline. I stood there and wathed the roach as it sat near the wall. About two seconds later Tracy walked in the room. I told her what happened and we proceeded to laugh about it. Then Tracy got a broom and tried to get the roach with it. It ran under my desk and into the corner. Tracy shoved the broom back there and TWO roaches came running out (which means there was aroach at my feet THE WHOLE TIME! ICK!) she chased them around the room while I took pictures for Facebook... hahaha... She smooshed one of them... or so we thought... (later it came alive again). The Reading Coach came in the room and gave us some Raid, which I don't think is good for you, but at that point I didn't really care. We Raided the room and found another roach that Tracy sprayed and killed. BLECH....

That night we had Girl's Night. We made dinner and had some cheap wine and hung out at my place. I was headed into my room from the dining area when a roach ran across my path. NNNOOOOO!!!!! Not in my home too!!!! Tracy guarded my bedroom door while I grabbed an empty laundry detergent bottle (I knew I had saved that for a reason!) and beat the roach to death while I screamed "Die! Die! Die!".. A little dramatic, but I'm sure you would've done the same... Tracy and I popped in a movie and fell asleep. The next morning we were getting ready for a Habitat project and that roach that I thought I had killed came gimping out from under my bed. I scooped him up and flushed him down the toilet. Yuck. Stupid roaches. So gross!

I Know Why I'm Here

To say that this was a hard week would be a huge understatement. I think this was the hardest week I've had yet, and I'm sure that some will be even harder which honestly, kind of scares me. But I know that this is where I'm supposed to be. On Wednesday, Tracy and I were in our room and we could hear a child crying, which in itself is not unusual. The crying was loud and intense, not like the sort of whiny I'm-not-getting-my-way cry. Then we heard what most definitely sounded like someone being hit and instantly the crying turned to that shrieking I'm-really-hurt cry. Tracy and I froze and looked at each other. I'm sure that my jaw hit the ground. We heard the sound three more times and both of us got up and ran out into the hallway only to realize that the sound wasn't coming from the hallway, it was coming from the classroom next door. Pretty soon the class and the teacher came out of the room and the teacher was screaming all sorts of nasty things at the kids. I have no doubt that she did hit that child, but there's nothing that I can do about it. I didn't actually see anything. Tracy and I had talked a few times about going to see the documentary Waiting for "Superman" and we decided right then that we needed to see it that evening. It's about the public school system here in the U.S. (check out the website here) So Wednesday night Tracy, Owen and I got together and had dinner and vented about how horrible the schools are and then we went and saw the movie. Wow. It completely described that place that I'm working (read my review here). It told us why these horrible teachers can do whatever they want and not get fired (thank you teacher's union) and it made me see once again that I am not alone in this fight to make things better for our kids.

Friday was so hard. I came up with a schedule that I had okayed by the teachers of when I was going to pull their kids. Well every Friday one of the teachers won't let me pull her kids because they're testing which is so frustrating because pretty soon I'm going to start getting in trouble for not meeting the requirements of how often I see the kids. She even had the audacity to ask me if I could see more of her kids, which I would LOVE to do, but I already can't see the kids of hers that I have. So I waited until their usual testing time was over and I walked into the classroom to start getting my kids. The teacher took one look at me, pointed and said "NO". I almost lost it on her. I am so sick and tired of being treated like trash! I just walked back to my room and banged my head against the desk a few times. Meanwhile Tracy was pulling her kids three at a time to try and get them all in so a couple of them ended up hanging out with me and making me feel better. Such a bunch of sweeties :) After the school day was over I went to the library for our afterschool tutoring. On Fridays none of the kids ever have homework so we sat with them and colored coloring pages. It was Tracy and I with two sets of sisters. Two of the girls are in 2nd grade and their sisters are both in kindergarten. We were asking them about their days and just chatting and goofing around when all of a sudden the older girls started talking about their older sisters' friend who was stabbed to death at 12 years old just last week. They knew all these horrible, grisly details about the incident and they talked for quite a long time about it. I didn't really know what to say so I just listened. Finally one of the younger girls ran over to me and grabbed me around the neck and held on. I didn't know if she was goofing around or what because 2 minutes earlier she had been making us crack up by laughing this goofy laugh. I sat there with my arm around her and she just stood there with me so finally I picked her up and put her in my lap. She curled up into a ball and cried those heartbreaking silent tears. Meanwhile one of the older girls said "you know, I'm angry that she's dead. I'm angry that she isn't here anymore because it's not right" Tracy assured her that it's okay to be angry and that she's exactly right that it isn't right that that happened. The little one sat in my lap crying for a good 20 minutes to a half hour. It broke me. I cried the whole drive home. Bobby called me and I cried to him and told him how angry I was and still am. No child should have to deal with such a violent death much less know all the grisly details. No child should have to live in fear that this will happen to them too. No child should have to mourn. Children should get the chance to be innocent and to laugh and to not be afraid. I'm angry that these parents can't get a leg up and take their children out of this neighborhood. I'm angry that these teachers are so incredibly horrible and rule by using fear instead of love. I'm angry that I'm not going to be here for these kids when this year is up and that I'll have to spend my life with their faces in my memory and wonder about them and hope for their futures and know that most of them won't get the education that they need to get out of there. I do know now that I'm here for a reason though. I was debating on going to part time so that I could get a second job and be able to pay my bills, but I can't do that now. These kids need me in such a huge way.

Getting Better

Last week was actually a really nice week. I now have two friends! Tracy became friends with one of our Americorps co-workers, Owen, and talked about me all the time and so we finally all got together and hung out. Tracy made us dinner and we chilled and whined about our crappy jobs... ha ha ha... But seriously, we kinda did.. I think we're going to try and make the dinner thing a weekly tradition. On Wednesday I went to the Water Festival. It was at a pretty nice private school and I sat in a classroom with 4th graders and assisted as this guy taught them about water filtration (apparantly Birmingham has some of the cleanest water in the nation.... and that's why it tastes like chlorine... I miss my St. Paul water. It tastes like dirt, but I love it). We gave the kids some stuff and challenged them to make a filtration system. They had a dixie cup, a coffee filter, cotton balls, beans and rice. The water had dirt, sequins, oil and vinegar in it. They had a lot of fun and I enjoyed watching them make connections about what they'd learned previously and putting it together with what they were learning right then. I love when you can see the "aha" moment on a kids face. Thursday we had a partial day and then got paid (yay!) and we had Friday off. I had another lovely weekend with Bobby :) we went to lunch and went and saw Hereafter (watch for my review here) and then split a piece of over priced, but super delicious Reese's chocolate cake cheesecake... The highlight of the day was skyping with most of my family :) It was so nice to see all of them (and my puppy!) and they got to meet (sort of) Bobby. He was really nervous, but I think they liked him!

Oh, the highlight of the week was buying my plane ticket home!!!!!! I will be home December 18-Jan1. I'm SOOOOO excited to see everyone (especially my puppy!). Although, I'm sure I'll be longing for the warmer weather that we have here (still in the 80s!)

Trying to keep the faith

This week was very... trying... On Tuesday I went to get food stamps and everything about the experience was horrible. The building is located in a sort of warehouse district and there are buildings lettered A-J. I didn't know what building I was looking for so I drove around and finally saw a sign that said "building B Department of Human Services Food Stamps Office" and pointed me in the direction. I went that way and it ended up being a creepy dead end with no building B in sight. I turned around and went the other way and found the building. I parked and walked up to the only door and it was locked. I started to panic because now I was late for my appointment. I saw a woman walking and stopped her to ask if she knew where I should go. Here's our conversation:
Me: "Excuse me, but I'm really lost and I was wondering if you could help me?"
Her: (slight look of confusion and annoyance) "Sure"
Me: "I'm looking for the Department of Human Services"
Her: "What?"
Me: (as she comes closer I see that she's wearing a name tag... for the Department of Human Services) "I'm looking for the Department of Human Services"
Her: (looking more confused) "What?"
Me: (I pull out the letter I got from them saying when my appointment is) "I'm looking for the Department of Human Services"
Her: "What?" (looks at the letter) "Oh the food stamp office. Walk up that hill and go to the front of this building" (I look and its definitely NOT building B... stupid sign)

I enter the building and don't know really where to go so I stop at the security desk. The officer looks at me and says "Go stand in line" and points. I walk to the line and see a sign that says "Wait at the sign for next available window" so I stand at the sign. I look around and notice signs all over saying "Make one line" and "You could wait up to 2 hours before we call your name" So I stand there and a line starts to form behind me and then next to me... Confusion... Then I eventually just jump in front of the guy that started the second line because I was there first. I tell the lady at the window that i have an appointment and I hand her my letter. She snatches it out of my hand and says "go sit down." so I turn around and see the rest of the room. There are rows and rows of chairs all filled with people. I sent a text to Tracy saying "hmm.. I think I grossly misunderstood how long this will take"...

An hour and 15 minutes later (didn't matter that we all had appointments...) my name gets called. I go to the sign in desk and stood there. The officer didn't acknowledge me at all so I thought that maybe I had to just sign my name. I picked up the pen and she snapped at me "and who are you?" I told her my name and she said "well was your name called?" I told her yes and she said "well I need to see some ID" So I gave her my ID and she looked at it and then said "write your name" so I wrote my name and she sent me through. I met my social worker and she walked me to her cube. I sat down and realized that the computer screen was directly between me and the social worker. She started asking me questions and I was thinking "Seriously? I'm supposed to talk to the back of this computer screen?" so I moved my chair over. The appointment went fine even though she was not very friendly at all. She told me I only qualified for $40 a month. My heart just dropped. Here I am a GOVERNMENT VOLUNTEER which means that I'm not technically employed so my income is technically 0 and the government wouldn't even give me assistance. I went and sat in my car and cried for about 15 minutes. I was just so overwhelmed. I was scared that I'm not gonna be able to make it, but mostly I was angry. It was seriously that white hot anger too. I had finally experienced "the system" and my eyes were opened. I felt degraded and had been looked at like I was worthless. People have to go through this on a regular basis and I only went through it once and it sucked. The people that need this assistance are people who have jobs and maybe some of them have bosses who are not understanding and maybe some of them have jobs that don't give out pto but all of them are made to sit there for HOURS and lose time from work and losing time means losing money and they're struggling as it is. And what the heck is the point of having an appointment when they just make you wait for 2 hours anyway. It made me so incredibly angry that here we (meaning the U.S. in general) trying to fix every other country when ours is so incredibly broken. I lost all faith in our government's ability to take care of it's own. I lost faith in voting because no one will fix the issue that I am now really passionate about and even if they say they're going to there is not enough time in a term to fix anything. Nothing ever gets done. America, this land of "opportunity" really kind of sucks. That day I was working at the office (to get a break from the school cause yikes) and I went to let my boss know that I was there and I ended up bursting into tears in her office. She was very gracious and understanding about it. She knows that I'm a long way from home and that everything is so overwhelming. She let me know that if I ever need a break from the school and the teachers to let her know and she'll set me up with Red Cross for a day or something so that I can breathe. The rest of the day was awesome because the other Americorps members were there and there was a lot of laughter and just being together is always fun. On Friday my boss texted me to ask me if I'd like to work at a water festival this Wed to get a break from the school. I'm really glad that she did that cause that school just sucks the life out of Tracy and I. So I have something to look forward too luckily...

It Really Is All About The Simple Things

Easy Mac is the perfect afternoon snack... I've been getting super hungry by about 1 since I take my lunch at 10:30. The other day I brought a thing of Easy Mac with my lunch but ended up saving it until the afternoon. Best. Idea. Evar. Talk about your comfort food. It was a kind of hard day and I was super tired and just wanted to go home, then out came that Easy Mac and I had a few minutes of cheesy goodness to brighten my day. I know, I know, I really should be eathing healthier things, but today I'm all about the simple pleasures... My weekly cup of Starbuck's decaf doused with sugar and half and half... It's hald the price of my regular (White Chocolate Mocha). I'm not usually a fan of Starbucks and I miss my Caribou SO much, but hey, I pay $2 for a cup of coffee and use the internet for as long as I want!

I've decided to try (and I emphasize try) not to let the people around me bother me. I got displaced from my room again, which was more than a little annoying, but I decided that all I can do is my job. All I can control is myself. Unfortunately, the kids suffer because the hallway is so busy and loud that we don't get much work done. But I can't control that. I can just try my best and realize that there's always tomorrow.

Bobby and I had another wonderful Saturday. We ate, we walked, we watched... Movies that is.. Well sort of. He watched Wall Street while I was bored to death. LOL... But it was nice. In the evening we even skyped with Bryn, Jake and baby Amara. It was lovely. Spending time with Bobby is always amazing <3

Tomorrow I go to get my food stamps set up, so hopefully next month will be a little bit easier in the money department. I've almost made it through October and I know that things are going to be ok and work out.

Habitat For Humanity

I got to work on a Habitat For Humanity project for three days this week! Boy am I tired! But it feels good. The project that I worked on was a part of the Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter Work Project. We worked at a subdivision called Wylam Oaks. The land was donated by U.S. Steel and there are 38 houses in the development. All 38 are Habitat houses. It's I think the largest all Habitat neighborhood in the U.S. if I heard that right... The first day Tracy and I got stuck painting trim in one of the houses. It wouldn't have been bad except that we were standing in the doorways painting and the work guys kept walking in and out. They never said "excuse me", instead they would pretty much just walk up on us and get closer and closer until we moved. Basically, they just pressed their bodies all on ours until we would move. It was so obnoxious. The lead builder guy was a complete jerk to everybody, including us. He kept yelling at us about dripping paint on the floor, when really we were dripping paint on our drop cloth and people kept stepping in it as they walked through.

On day 2 Tracy got sick of the painting and the rudeness so I ended up painting with Brittni, another Americorps member. It was really annoying because they wouldn't let us tape the wall so that we could do the little lip on the trim and so I told them that I wasn't going to paint the lip beacause it was pretty much impossible to do it and not get paint on the wall. I was very harshly told "no. It's not impossible, you just have to be careful and get it done." I didn't do it. Seriously, I'm not a professional painter and I'm not about to be the one to get yelled at for getting paint on the wall. Once I got finished with painting I went to a different house because the one I was at had way too many cooks in the kitchen and the people were such jerks. So I went and painted at another house where there were only a few people and they were much much nicer. Oh, I almost forgot. At the rude house in the middle of the morning Garth Brooks showed up to help out! He was actually mostly in the way because they would set up a project and have him like drill a hole and then everyone would take pictures and then they'd move him on to something else and he'd paint a strip of wall and everyone would take a picture... But it was pretty cool that he showed up and had good intentions. He was a really nice guy too. The Americorps team got our picture taken with him. He asked us all our names and shook our hands and said "I'm Garth" it was kind of funny.

Day 3: I woke up this morning and found out that my cell phone service got shut off... Not a great way to start the day (mom, if you don't hear from me, don't worry, I'm still alive). But I worked at the nice house this morning and put some finishing touches on the yard and mostly just stood around and hung out with my co workers which was fun. We don't get to see each other much because we're at different schools so it's fun to all get together and get to know everyone a little better. We had fried catfish for lunch which was DELICIOUS. I'd never had catfish before. Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter showed up (catfish is his favorite, so that's why we had it) and we got our picture taken and he spoke at the dedication ceremony for the neighborhood and he and Rosalynn cut the ribbon. It was pretty cool to be a part of. The Carters put together a Habitat project every year and switch off between the U.S. and another counrty each year. Next year they will be bulding in Haiti. Actually they decided to build in Haiti for the next 2 years. So that's pretty cool. I guess before the earthquake Habitat built 200 houses in Haiti and every single one of them is still standing.

Anyways, it was a good week. I really enjoy working for Habitat and getting things done. I love how you can see the progress that you've made. Now for some rest and the weekend!

The Weekend...

I had such a lovely weekend. It made all my frustrations and emotions from last week just melt away. On Saturday Bobby came over in the morning and we watched a movie and just hung out. He's so wonderful :) We went to Vulcan Park where there's this gigantic statue of Vulcan (I see it from the freeway every morning on the way to work and got curious...) So we went and saw the statue and walked around the park. It's a beautiful park and it overlooks downtown Birmingham. There's also a museum there, but we didn't go in it. Maybe some time when we actually have money... Then we went on a mission to find a birthday present for Bobby's nephew Cade. We ended up getting him Toy Story Pjs, a 3D Toy Story t shirt and a lego Star Wars t shirt (can you tell what Cade's really into?). We had a late lunch at Chuy's, which has totally become "our" place. Chuy's is in The Summit which is hard to explain. It's an outdoor mall, but it's not all in one big strip or square. It's all spread out. We walked almost the whole thing. There are water fountains and flowers and random statues of kids running (they kinda creeped me out...). It's so pretty and peaceful. Then we went to the Cheesecake Factory and shared a piece of Red Velvet Cheesecake. YUM! It was so nice to just chill and walk around and it was all laid back and peaceful.

On Sunday I went to Tuscaloosa and Bobby and I went to Cade's birthday party. It was a Toy Story party. Cade was Buzz Lightyear. It was so cute. It was also nice to finally meet Cade and Callie (Bobby's niece). I've been talking to them on the phone for the last 3 1/2 years, so it was so fun to meet them. After the party Bobby and I went to his house and watched The Great Outdoors and Grumpy Old Men (look for my reviews here soon) both of which reminded me so much of home. That was the end of my Bobbylicious weekend... Back to reality on Monday morning :-/

This week has actually been pretty good. Monday was a full day at the school. Tuesday we had a training all about culture and we got to talk about what we had seen in the classrooms and process all of that a little bit. The biggest thing they drilled into us was that we're there for the kids so do not let the grown ups steal your joy! It was a perfect re-energizer! Today we did a Habitat for Humanity project. There's this whole development with 38 houses that Habitat has built. I was there today, and will be there again tomorrow. We're getting as much done as possible because on Friday Jimmy Carter will be visiting. I really really wish I could go on Friday, but I think we're gonna have to go back to our schools. :(

Bobby and I at The Summit <3

This is Frustrating

I've been sitting in classrooms the last couple of days and I am still appalled and shocked by the way the teachers treat these kids. I don't remember if I've written about the teacher who has all the middle and upper kids on one side of the room and all of the others on the other side (she calls her low scorers her "retards"). I noticed the other day that when she's teaching she only speaks to the "smart" side of the room and ignores the other side. There's one child who has the hardest time sitting still and he'll be really really focused for a short period of time and then he'll just lose it and start laying on the floor or doing whatever and of course I just absolutely ADORE this child... (Tami, I don't know if you still read this, but that was for you ha ha) Well when the teacher gets fed up with him she pops him into the Reading Room (the room I share with the specialists) and leaves him there. Not even for like ten minutes or whatever, no she leaves him there for HOURS. This child is one of the lower scoring children in the class. How is he supposed to improve if he's being forced out of the classroom every day? She's already told me that she intends to fail him. At this point if he fails it is the fault of the teacher, not his. He's not even being given a fighting chance. Tracy was tealling me that she pulled a child from the kindergarten room and tested him on his letter and sound recognition. He knew them all and so she brought him back to class and the teacher asked hos it went and Tracy said "Oh it went great!" to which the teacher replied "Well that's impossible. I tested him last week and he didn't know anything because he's too stupid." IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS. How humiliating and degrading! Tracy simply said "oh no, he knew every single one" and had to walk out of the classroom to take a moment to calm down. What is wrong with these teachers? They have no faith in their kids' ability to improve. These kids are in kindergarten and first grade and they're already being treated like lost causes.

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Today I got to work and was locked out of my room. Tracy and I sat outside of the room for 45 minutes just waiting. We knew the Speech Pathologist doesn't work at our school on Thursdays and one of the other specialists had been sick on and off all week. The Reading Coach however, we were not sure about. She never showed up so there we were, sitting on the hallway floor wondering what to do. A teacher saw us there and sent a student to go get the custodian to let us in. The girl came back and said "oh she said you need to go work in the classrooms." We were sort of confused by this because for one thing all of our stuff was locked in our room and for another we had never met this particular custodian and so why was she telling us what to do? The Special Ed teacher came walking by and she went with Tracy to go talk to the custodian again. They asked and the custodian got really rude and said "oh no, I'm not lettin' in no Americorps." The special ed teacher was really surprised by how incredibly rude she was and said "well since when is it your job to say who gets in and who doesn't?" the custodian replied with "(The Reading Coach)  said don't let no Americorps in the room." Tracy talked her into opening it long enough for us to get whatever stuff we needed for the day (as she watched us with her hands on her hips scowling at us) and we went back into the hallway to figure out what to do for the day.

Here are some of my frustrations. First of all, in years past BhamREADS Americorps has always trained their volunteers first and then sent them to the schools. However, they found that the volunteers were confused and didn't understand the training so this year for the first time they sent us into the school and then they're going to train us. We had our training on what we're doing, but the training on how we're doing it has been postponed. Twice. So what we are supposed to be doing is going into the classrooms during their 90 minute reading block in the morning (which I've been doing). We're only supposed to observe. We are not Teacher's Aides and so we are not to let the teachers treat us as such. We are not to run off copies, grade homework or teach. We're there to observe and get a feel for the culture. We're not supposed to be pulling kids out yet. We're not supposed to be documenting yet. Since we're not trained yet, its put us in a really awkward position. Since we can't pull kids or do anything all we do all day is our morning observation, then our lunch break and then try and find whatever busy work or prep work that we can to prepare for when we are able to pull kids. We're been at this for 3 weeks, there's really only so much prep work that can be done. I'm pretty much set till December. So a lot f the time it looks like we're just sitting there doing nothing... Which we are... But not because we're lazy, its because our hands are sort of tied. The Reading Coach has gotten a little irritated with us I think. Last week she told us that we didn't look gainfully employed. On Tuesdays we stay at the school until 3:30 instead of 3 because we have a spanish class at 3:45, well this Tuesday she got all "well aren't you supposed to be at the school right now?" And then the thing today. She told the custodian not to let us in, which means that she knew she wasn't going to be there and didn't let us know so that we could grab what we needed. Here's the deal. The custodian is not our boss. The Reading Coach is not our boss. The Principal is not our boss. Americorps is our boss. Secondly, we are not technically employed. We are Government Volunteers. Once we really get in the swing of things I will be putting in 50 hours a week. With the amount of money I make at the end of the month that turns out to be about $4.91 per hour. Before taxes. I do not get paid enough to be treated like crap. Do not tell me what and how to do my job when you did not sit in the training sessions that I did. Our job is not the same as the Reading Coaches. I'm sick and tired of people giving me attitude and dirty looks just because they think I'm making a paycheck by sitting around and because they think that that's what I'm going to be doing all year. Today was so hard. There were times at SPCC when I felt underappreciated but this is a million times worse. I feel so unwanted and out of place. I really just need to focus on the fact that I'm not here to please these people. I'm here for these kids who come from broken down homes and are broken down even more by their teachers. I'm here to love them and to show them that there are adults in this world who love and respect them even when they make mistakes. I'm here to make a difference and to change Whatley K-8 by loving on its kids.

September is almost over?

We had a training last week about the Alabama Reading Initiative and they explained a little about why we are only working with the middle and upper kids. The first reason is that the teachers are supposed to be working one on one a few times a days with the bottom kids (I have not seen this happening), The other reason is that BirminghamREADS wants us to feel successful at the end of the year and see progress in the kids we are working with. Therefore we are working with the kids that we are most likely to see improvement from. In my opinion this totally labels the low kids as lost causes. If the kids are low and failing this badly I honestly believe it is the fault of the teachers, not of the kids. These teachers are failing to do their jobs in an effective manner. One of the teachers that I work with has all her smart kids on one side of the room and her "retards" (as she calls them) on the other side. She doesn't even try and help the kids that need the help. She just stands there and yells at them. It breaks my heart so much and I so want to work with those kids. I had 3 of the lower kids in a small group and I was leading them through the same thing the class was doing, but at their pace and one of them totally could figure out what he was supposed to do simply by having me there to explain it to him in a way that he understood and then sit with him and go at his pace. I'm really sad that I can't officially work with him.

At the training last week we heard about a study that was done that showed that by the age of 4, kids in higher socioeconomic families had heard/been exposed to 45 million words, whereas kids in lower socioeconomic families had only heard 13 million words. She also said that some places (I can't remember if it was specifically Alabama) choose how many prisons to build based on how many kids are still illiterate by second grade. Tracy, my Americorps co worker who is at the same school as I am, spoke with a woman who does tutoring in prisons here in Alabama and said that the prisons here have an 85 % illiteracy rate. It just goes to show just how important knowing how to read really is.

Bobby and I had a wonderful date day last Saturday. We watched an episode of House (his obsession) and then went to The Summit which is like this HUGE outdoor mall. We went to this awesome Tex-Mex place called Chuy's which has the most amazing food. It's definitely our new favorite place. :) Then we went to see The Town (look for my review soon) We also went to the Cheesecake Factory for dessert. YUM! It was definitely the perfect day <3

So for Americorps I have to do 50 non-Americorps hours of service by the end of the year. Tracy and I went searching for some opportunites this week and found one that we both just fell in love with. Its for an organization called Stand Up For Kids. The mission of this organization is to go out into the streets and meet homeless kids aged 21 and younger and let them know that they care about them and then prove it. I'm really excited to work with them!

I also found a church that I really like. Its called Church of the Highlands and it's a multi campus church that reminds me a TON of Eagle Brook. I really enjoyed it!

Alabama is Weird

Over the past few weeks I have been keeping track of all the little ways that Alabama is different from Minnesota. Here is the list so far:

• Cornbread isn't sweet. Tea, however is so sweet it's like drinking syrup.
• Shopping carts are referred to as "buggies"
• Nobody uses their turn signal if they're already in a turn lane. It's just assumed that if you're in the lane then, duh, you're going to turn.
• It's rude to reply with "yeah" or "yup". It's always "yes ma'am" or "yes sir"
• If you walk by someone and don't acknowledge them it's considered rude. People randomly greet you wherever you are and ask how you are. It's weird.
• Cherry Coke is not commonly available in restaraunts and movie theaters like it is at home.
• Alabamans live, eat and breath college football.
• Do not under any circumstances insult the Alabama Crimson Tide.
• In the school that I work at I've been told that Megan is not really a common name and therefore is hard to remember.
• Parking ramps are called "decks"
• When something is funny they say "that tickled me"
• Alabamans seriously do not know how to merge. They think that stopping at the bottom of the entrance ramp is an appropriate way to merge.
• If you go to a fair and ask your Alabaman boyfriend if the fair sells cheese curds he will look at you and say "what are cheese turds?"
• When a movie has parts that are not appropriate for kids they are called "ugly parts" or if someone says something mean/rude they'll say "I don't mean to be ugly, but it's true" or something to that effect
• Don't end a sentence with "with". They won't know that you're done talking.

This list will grow I'm sure...

Tuesday....

This school does not want us. They will not work with us to find us a place to work with the kids. There are four trailer "condos" and we were initially told by Ms. C, the Reading Coach that we could use one, but then the principal got SUPER pissed and said they were all in use. We kept trying to ask if they were all in use all the time, or if there were some open times that we could use them. We didn't really get any answers to that. There is an empty classroom, but we're told we can't use it because a program called Better Basics will be using it for three hours once a week. Seriously? We can't use it the other 34.5 hours a week that we're in the school? Yesterday we finally set up a "classroom" under the stairs. We got permission from the principal to move out a broken refrigerator and to move around a broken copier and we got all set up in this cozy little spot and we were all excited about it. We got back to school this morning and were kicked out from under the stairs because they wanted to fix the fridge (that no one apparantly uses since it was sitting there broken for who knows how long) and move it back into that spot. Tracy (my Americorps co-worker) and I just sat under the stairs for the longest time trying to figure out what to do and feeling so defeated. Tracy called the school district's Employee Assistance Program director to get some advice. She was told that Whatley (the school) has been difficult in the past and they tend to not like Americorps. She told us to call Ms. D (our coordinator) to ask how the librarian feels about Americorps and then seeing if we can set up shop in the library. Kind of feels like picking allies for a war or something... Aren't we all on the same side? Aren't we all in it for the good of the kids? We couldn't get ahold of Ms. D so we ended up moving our stuff back into the room the Reading Coach shares with the Speech Pathologist and another specialist. So there are 5 of us splitting one classroom. Not ideal, but at least we know our stuff won't walk off...

I was in a meeting yesterday with the reading coach, the Better Basics people and the other specialists. The principal talked a lot about giving help to the kids who had middle and upper test scores because "those are the ones who can be moved". So we're working with middle and upper so the school's test scores as a whole will go up. I'm sort of upset by that. I have a really hard time just letting the kindergarten and first graders who don't cut it slip through the cracks. Especially since this is a k-8 school. We're setting up the k and 1st graders to fail for their entire 8 years at Whatley. That's so much time to grow and improve and develop.

After school I do tutoring for the school's afterschool program which is held at a library about a block away. It's seriously the cutest little library, but all the shelves are half full. The very bottom shelves are empty and there are many places where the whole shelves are taken out for displays. It's really sad! The librarians are super sweet though.

Today we had a moment of silence because the 13th was the anniversary of the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church bombing that killed 4 little girls. I asked Ms. C about it and she said that to this day if you ask someone who was there about it they still get choked up and you can just see the grief in their faces. I can't even imagine suffering a loss like that or witnessing that.

The First Week and a Half

So I've been here for a little longer than a week and a half and so far I LOVE it. Yeah, the weather is a little on the steamy side, especially with no AC in the car, but it's all worth it. Birmingham is absolutely beautiful and my apartment is in a really nice location (don't worry, its also very secure-its gated and in the evening there is a security guard at the gate checking parking passes, and on he weekend a police officer joins him) and my 2 roommates are never home (one of them I've seen once and haven't officially met) so I pretty much have the run of the place. My job is going really well so far. I'm in training until the end of the month, but it's been good. This last week I got to be at the school that I'll be at for the year and I got to meet the kids and teachers that I'll be working with. It's like a whole other world there. So different from what I'm used to. I'll be serving 25 first graders and they are way behind - some can't write their names yet, which broke my heart. The teachers are super strict and really harsh. They go from 0 to 100 in less than 2 seconds. Once second they'll be talking to a child and the next they'll be SCREAMING in that child's face. I've heard a lot of "I'm gonna bust your head if you don't stop that" and just so much screaming. I did take a small group of kids out of the classroom on Thursday because they were disrupting the class and so I offered to work on their work with them and oh my goodness, this is going to be a challenge. They were just so all over the place and made me understand why the teachers are so frustrated. No, I didn't scream at any of them, but I did have to use my stern teacher voice. One of the teachers that I'm with is so thankful that I'm there, she said "It's only your second day and you've already been such a blessing by taking those kids out and working with them, you are truly blessed." The other first grade teacher treats me like I'm not there for the most part. On Friday my team and I did Habitat for Humanity and I learned how to install vinyl siding. It was SO much fun and it was so awesome to see hos much we got accomplished in that one day (we got 3 of the main walls sided). We all went to lunch together too so it was really nice to visit and get to know one another a little better. I'm learning my way around here. I have a little notebook that I write directions down in so I can have them whenever I need them. I've been having to use it less and less though which is really good. I found out this week that at the Davis Center (its some sort of school district office and the building that has the READS office in it) they are offering FREE Spanish classes! So I get to take a spanish class every Tuesday AND get paid for it! So I'm really excited about that. It's really neat to see how God used Nicaragua to prepare me for this, from having a servant heart right down to the hot, sticky weather. I love it.

On a personal note, I met Bobby... Finally... and we're having so much fun spending time together. He makes sure I get at least one good meal in me a week. He was a little horrified to find out that I'm pretty much living on pb and j and tortillas with cheese and lunchmeat in them. So he makes sure I get fed and that my gas tank is full. It's great, I'm gonna get spoiled! I've gotten to hang out with his family a little bit as well, mainly his dad and step mom and that's been nice too to get to know them. I will try and keep this updated as much as possible so keep checking back! I mostly will only have time to update on weekends because I don't have internet yet and so I have to go to Starbucks or the library or whatever.

My Next Adventure

So while I was in Nicaragua, we went to La Chureca (the community in a garbage dump for those who haven't been following along) and while we were there Raul, one of the translators, told us that he had grown up 5 minutes away from La Chureca and didn't know people were living there until he started working with ORPHANetwork. That really hit me and got me to think about what types of places are there in the U.S. or even near my home that I don't know about. There may not be any horror as large as La Chureca in the U.S. (or maybe just not one that I know of) but anytime anyone has to climb into a dumpster for the night or to find food its basically the same thing. Nicaragua opened my eyes to the world beyond my neighborhood. It made me see that poverty is real, not just something that you see on tv as you flip the channel. I've looked into the eyes of poverty. When I came home I really struggled with going back to work at SPCC. The majority of the kids at SPCC have all that they need to succeed in life and my heart was just not in it. Don't get me wrong, I know that there was value to the work that I did at SPCC, and I loved the kids that I worked with, but from the time I was a teenager I always desired to work with inner city kids. Kids who were being set up to fail by the lack of support from their parents, by a failing school system and by the lack of having positive mentors in their lives. I didn't really know what I exactly wanted to do, so Eben told me to look into Americorps. I did a search and one of the first jobs that came up was a program called BirminghamREADS which is a literacy program in Birmingham, Alabama. When I read the description, I just fell in love with the job. It talked about working with at risk 2nd and 3rd graders to help them gain reading confidence and providing homework help. I applied, had an interview where they asked me what I thought of when I thought of at risk youth and I said that often it's single parent homes, the parent has to maybe work multiple jobs to keep afloat and therefore is not around for their kids to help guide them and help with homework etc. They really liked that answer and talked about how many of the kids will come to school in the same outfit for a week or their hair won't be combed or their parents are incarcerated and theyre being raised by a sibling or parent. I just fell in love with those kids as she was telling me about them. I didn't hear anything back for a really really long time and just assumed that I didn't get the job. Then 3 weeks ago I got the call that I got it and I needed to relocate to Birmingham! So here I am, in a city all by myself, away from my family, away from everything familiar. I never thought I had it in me to do this, but I did it! This week we're in training... Well actually, we'll be in training for the month of September, but next week we'll be assigned to our school and we'll shadow the reading coach and get to know the kids. I'm super excited for what this year holds.

Before I left, I asked my friend Rachel to give me advice. She spent a year doing Mission Year in Pennsylvania I think it was living in inner city and working ith churches but I don't really remember, it was a long time ago. Anyways, it was spending a year away from everything familiar and really digging in and getting dirty. The advice she gave me was so important. She told me to be present in the moment. Even the hard ones because one day even this will be a distant memory. She also went on to say "I keep thinking about how we only get to do this life one time, so enjoy it and learn from it and love big with big risks and don't be afraid to have your heart broken again and again because you kept loving even after it hurt. I am sure you will meet such amazing people and it will be tempting to just pass through, since it is a definite time frame--but don't. Really invest. Don't wait to invest. Really invest. Because I think that's what made it meaningful to me." I think that this advice will be so valuable to me this year (thanks Rachel!) and I'm so excited for this year and for everything that it holds, good and bad. I will try my hardest to update this as often as possible, but right now I don't have internet at my apartment, but today I'm sitting at a Starbucks, so hopefully I'll have more opportunities to do that. Love you and miss you all back home!

Journal Entry #5

Friday, June 18 2010










Today was our day of compassion. We were split into "families" of four and given the story of a family from Nicaragua as well as their daily pay, what they have in savings, and a shopping list of items they need. My family was from Nueva Vida and made about $2 per day. We had to buy breakfast and lunch for all four of us. Breakfast was rice and beans, cheese (not a good cheese either, their cheese was really weird) and a tortilla. I think we got one serving of rice and beans and split it between the four of us, but I can't remember. Then we headed off to Huembes Marketplace where we had to find some supplies for our family. This was probably the most frustrating part of the trip thus far. We joined up with another "family" and I think some other stragglers (it seemed like our group was really big) and we wandered around the market lookingfor supplies. We didn't know where to look, we didn't really speak the language and we couldn't all agree on which direction we should go in anytime we came to an intersection. Then the whole group would randomly stop in the middle of the walkway and just look around which was really frustrating for me because I HATE when people do that at the mall and at stores! We eventually got our supplies and got back to the bus to drop them off and then went back to do our own shopping. Our group kind of split up and went seperate directions. I bought some Nicaraguan coffee (why did I only buy one bag!?!), a shot glass (I collect them everywhere I go), a baseball jersey that says Nicaragua for my unborn niece, a purse, and then I saw a purse I liked better so I bought that too, and a t shirt. I think that's all. I don't remember. I got some nice treasures to bring back in any case. I was SO hungry by the time we got back to the bus. I had some trail mix with me that I ate, but it didn't really help that much. We got back to the Team Center for lunch which we had to buy, and was the same as breakfast, and then it was time for our work groups. I was so tired and weak from not being used to being hungry and I started getting a bad headache so I went and took a nap. I felt really lame doing that since everyone else was probably feeling the same way, but oh well.

I felt much better after my nap, so I went and helped out in the Bodega (the storage room). We painted the storage room and also hung out with the kids and made desks. That evening we had a worship service led by the teenagers from the orphanage. Then we put on a dramatic interpretation of The Good Samaritan (I was a sunny sunshine) Then Don gave a little sermon. After that we had Nicaragua Dance Party 2010! It was super fun with Casa Bernabe's longest Conga Line led by 5 year old Paola... I'm having issues with putting pics on here, so sorry no pics of that! They're on my facebook though...

I didn't really write in my journal the last few days. We spent a lot of time with the kids, but I was really frustrated because by then all the kids had their person or people that they had become attached to and since my work project had kept me away from the kids for the most part I ended up tagging along with other team members and their little friend(s). On the way home we got stuck in Miami overnight so Igot home a day late which was really frustrating and made me crabby, but it turned out okay. And that concludes my Nicaragua trip, now on to my next adventure...

Journal Entry #4

Thursday July 17, 2010

Today was a heavy day. It started out awesome though. We did a cool ice breaker where we stood in 2 lines and talked to our partnet for 2 minutes while we walked around the Casa Bernabe grounds. Then after 2 minutes, the person on the right would walk up ahead to the next person and start a new conversation. It was cool to at least have a conversation with a few people that I hadn't talked to at all the whole trip.

The Baby Room/Area

Then we hopped on our bus to our first destination for the day. It was a church called El Faro (The Lighthouse). It's a church on the outskirts of La Chureca. La Chureca is a community living in a garbage dump. They spend their days working in the garbage, collecting anything that can be recycled or eaten. There was a story of a young single mother who had to go out and work. She had nowhere to leave her baby, so she left it in her "house" (more like a shack) and covered it with a cardboard box so the stray dogs wouldn't harm it. She went and did a full days work and came back to find that her house and her baby were gone because the bulldozers had come through during the day. This was not an uncommon occurrence and this church, El Faro, saw the need for a daycare. So they have a daycare that serves the families of La Chureca, as well as giving micro loans for people to start small businesses in La Chureca.

There was a lot going on at the daycare. I was standing awkwardly (again) and just was trying to take it all in. I finally prayed a little prayer "God, I just want to make a connection". A little while later, Nate was holding this toddler and asked if I wanted to hold him. I said yes and took him and just held onto him. He was so quiet and calm (he had just woken up from a nap and seemed a little out of it still lol) and he had that sweet baby sweat smell (that is apparently the same in all countries :)) About half of the group went into La Chureca to do some work while the rest of us stayed at the daycare to help out. (They were short staffed due to sickness, and by the way, all the men went into Chureca because we had been told numerous times of the dangers. A few of the women did go, but they were cautioned to stay with the men at all times). I held on to the baby who was just content watching everyone play. I walked around with him a little bit and started to just pray over him. Suddenly, I was just overwhelmed by emotion and started to cry a little bit. I couldn't help it, and I tried to hold it back (I don't cry in public...). I brushed my tears away and Laura walked over and said that the little girl she was playing with was very concerned about me. So cute. Then Alissa walked over and said "Don't you just wish you could take him home?" and I just couldn't hold back the tears and started full out crying. The baby was just content in my arms with me crying all over him... Ha ha... Then I fed him lunch, which from the picture you can tell he just LOVED.... Ha ha...

When things slowed down at the daycare, we asked Josias, our translator, when we were going into La Chureca. He apologetically said that he thought he maybe messed something up and that we weren't going to get to go... There was a moment of mixed feelings for me. I was almost relieved, but at the same time disappointed that we would miss out on an experience that everyone else on the trip had. I wanted to see with my own eyes. Josias made a few phone calls and then came and told us our ride was here. We looked and didn't see a bus, and then Ramon, the pastor of El Faro, got out of a Nissan Pathfinder and motioned for us to come over. We were all sort of like, you've got to be kidding. Then Josias started opening the doors and the back hatch. Laura said "Oh, we're really doing this" and climbed in. I followed. We ended up cramming 11 passengers in this Nissan Pathfinder. There were 2 in the front seat, 4 in the middle and 5 of us smooshed in the back/trunk. The back hatch wouldn't close, so Josias just shut the spare tire gate and we bounced around back there. Being crammed was funny so we were all just laughing and laughing and so it took away the shocking, sobering moment when you drive through the gates of La Chureca.

My hand is on my knee on the left side of this picture...

There I am!

The smell hit us first. Trash was piled everywhere and we were on a deep muddy "road". I was actually a little worried that we'd get stuck in the mud. Bulldozers were pushing garbage around and stray dogs were all over. We stopped at a feeding center to meet up with the rest of our group. There were shantys as far as you could see. The few minutes we had at the feeding center are a blur as I took in all the smells and sights around me. Raol took us up a hill to overlook the Community. When we got about halfway up there was a nasty pond with green scum over the top and garbage falling into it. Raol told us it was the swimming pool.

It's not in the picture, but on the right side of the pool, there was a steep hill with trash piled at the top and trailing down all the way to the bottom and into the water. We got to the top of the hill and words do not even describe what I saw. Piles of trash with bulldozers and people covering it. Vultures soared over their heads. The heat was intense and the sun just beat down on us. You could see the people rummaging through the trash. We walked back down the hill and I almost stepped on a chunk of bone. We went to the bus and I was just numb.
(Photos courtesy of the Litchys)

Prayers for Casa Bernabe

Eddy Morales, the Field Director for ORPHANetwork gave a talk to us on the evening of the 16th.

These are the goals of ORPHANetwork for Casa Bernabe and also things to pray for for them.

• Spiritual Development
• They want the kids to grow up to want to serve the Lord when they are out on their own, by their own choice.

• Education
• Learn English
• Develop computer skills
• Perform well in class
• Go to college

• Help
• Nourishment (balanced meals)
• Medical team to come to Casa Bernabe
• Preventitive check ups
• Dental
• Hygeine

• Self Esteem
• Birth certificates
• Encourage the kids and build them up.

Eddy is such a passionate speaker and really desires to see Nicaragua heal from the inside out with the influence of the kids at Casa Bernabe. He said that he wants to be an old man laying in a hammock and watching the news and hearing that one of his Casa kids are changing Nicaragua for the better (he even threw out some names) and when that happens he can die with a smile on his face.

Journal Entry #3

June 16th, 2010

I LOVE my small group!

They are all just so super awesome and really supportive. I love knowing that we share struggles and so I don't have to struggle alone. (I don't know what I was struggling with, I didn't write it down...) Today was another busy-ish day. We went to Nueva Vida which is a refugee camp for Hurrican Mitch that ended up becoming permanent housing. It's hard to even describe it. The roads were littered with trash and stray dogs. The houses were basically shacks made with scrap metal.

We got to the feeding center and had a tour. They have an area where they teach kids to make jewelery and a room where a gentle woman named Ana teaches girls to sew and do embroidery (basically teaching these kids a trade). They have a bakery and a woodworking shop that has so little, yet always gives 10% of its profits back to the feeding center. We got to play and hang out with the kids. They are all so full of joy and acceptance. One little girl took me by the hand and started speaking to me in Spanish but I didn't understand her, so I brought her to Jenn and it turned out she wanted me to come to her house, but I had to say no. Later as I was pushing some kids on the swing that same little girl and her little sister (?) came up to me and sat down on the swing. I asked her if she wanted me to push them and she said "yes please". So I pushed them for awhile and then she stopped the swing, looked at me for a moment and quietly said "thank you". It was such a sweet moment. Then it came time to feed the kids. The kids came in and sat at tables. They bring their own bowls and cups. We went to each table with a tray to collect the bowls and cups, brought them to the kitchen where they were filled, and then brought them back to the kids. They had white rice with some vegetables and torta carne (meatball). After the kids ate we played with them for a little while. I was so awkward and didn't really know what to do. I just sort of clammed up for whatever reason and was really frustrated with myself.

In the afternoon we started our work projects. We painted the warehouse (which was actually just a room) with 2 coats of paint.

In the evening we had a really great small group time. Eddy joined us and Alissa and Karsen both shared some really awesome stuff (sorry, its confidential) Then we had a really awesome prayer time with Eddy.

What surprised me most about this culture? What are my feelings about this day?
 The kids at the feeding center just had so much joy. They had huge smiles and hugs for us. I love that they walk by you and just grab your hand. They also took care of one another. The older kids helped feed the younger kids. There were some that couldn't eat all of the food and so they scraped it onto someone else's plate. Just a really good picture of what community should look like.


*The two Nueva Vida pictures don't belong to me... They are courtesy of the Litchys.... and the picture of Jen and I painting is Don Graffam's...

Journal Entry #2 (continued)

June 15, 2010 Evening

We went to lunch at a buffet style place. Delicious food! I had chicken, plantain fries (which probably would have been good if they had been warm...), the Nica version of fried rice, some sort of potato salad ish dish and a ball of mashed potato that had been deep fried (sounded yummy, but the cheese here is kinda weird and I don't like it). I also had chicken broth with lime juice in it which was yummy and an orange Fanta with REAL sugar (lol) instead of corn syrup! So yummy.

We went and saw the only two buildings still standing after the big earthquake (1972?). One is the Cathedral (right), and one is the National Palace. They were both built by the same architect... These are also both in Revolution Square. (Sorry if the pictures are messed up, this thing has major picture issues!!!!!!)

We went back to Casa Bernabe and had some down time so we went and hung out in our room. Jennifer P. mentioned to Nubia (one of the translators, she roomed with us) that it would be
fun to pick a mango from one of the surrounding trees. Nubia simply said "ok" and left the room. She came back with a guy who used a big long stick to knock down some mangoes and caught them as they fell. They were so incredibly delicious! Beth taught us to bite off the tip and then peel it like a banana. I ate half of mine and then a little worm crawled out of it... So much for the rest of that mango!


<- Nubia and the Mango Man

                                                     Nubia made sure we each got a mango

                                          Laura, Jennifer P. and I enjoying our mangos

Later we finally got to meet the kids in the orphanage. I helped do nail polish with the teen girls. They were very shy at first and didn't want my help. Then Maria Teresa grabbed my hand and sat me down and painted my nails. She didn't really want to talk to me though... :)


During our training sessions we got a book called Before You Pack Your Bags, Prepare Your Heart. In it are some leading questions for journaling. Here is the question I answered for June 15th

In what ways was I stretched beyond my comfort zone today?

We went to paint the fingernails of the older girls and it was really hard to make conversation because they were very guarded and also because of the language barrier. I still feel so inadequate when dealing with kids which is dumb since that's what my job is....

Reflections:
I really got a kick out of seeing the school at Casa Bernabe and seeing the similarities and differences between their pre k room and my pre k room. They had the bulletin boards with birthdays and with the days of the week and all of that. The big difference was the size and also it looked like they didn't have any play areas. I wish I had been able to observe a class in session just to see what it was like (maybe on a future trip after I learn some more spanish?) I also really want to learn more about Nicaragua's political history. We got such a brief whirlwind explanation and I'd like to read deeper about it... Guess I'll have to find some books!

Journal Entry #3

Tuesday June 15, 2010 Evening

Today was BUSY! We had a delicious breakfast of scrambeled eggs with ham and jalapenos, homemade yummy tortillas, watermelon and delivious sweet juicy white pineapple.

Then we listened to Jamileth speak briefly about Casa Bernabe and then she took us on a tour. We saw the housing for the teen boys (left) and girls (right)

And also the younger boys and girls (shown here is the boys, the girls looked basically the same)

We also saw the plantain fields and the chickens they keep.

There is also a school on the grounds as well (not pictured due to frustrations with getting the pictures arranged on here... sorry). We a huge line of fire ants carrying small bits of leaves down a tree, across our path and to who knows where (picture courtesy of someone else)... Jamileth is so sweet and just such a calming presence and you can tell that the kids really respect her. Its so neat. It was neat to see how their preschool classrooms were set up similarily to Room X (minus the areas and with desks).

Next we went on a tour of Managua. We went to a place where you can see a lot of the city. So beautiful. We were given a brief oral history of the country which was so interesting (given by Tony the Translator sitting near Gem Lake)

This is about half the entry... I will add in the other half and my reflections another day :)

Journal Entry #2

Tuesday June 15, 2010 6:15 am

We made it last night! Everyone got through customs (note: There was a member from the team that went through Houston who had a visa issue and was turned away, however, she will be going with either Lino or Spring Lake Park in August) and no one lost any bags. It is so different here. Even the air at the airport smelled different. We were greeted by our first Nicaraguan while waiting to go through customs.

 Outside the airport we were greeted by Eddy Morales (the ORPHANetwork field director) and a bus.

We drove through Managua to Casa Bernabe and I just sat back and took it all in. The buildings were very small and the houses were dirty. Nothing like the tall shiny skyscrapers that litter downtown Minneapolis and Saint Paul. There were lots of people and kids just hanging out along the dark street.

We got to the Team Center and settled into our rooms and waited for the other group to arrive. Right away one of the translators introduced himself to us. His name is Alvaro (Al) and he shared his story with my small group. He came to the orphanage at Casa Bernabe when he was 5 and stayed here for about 6 years. He said that people would talk to him about Jesus but he was so angry, too angry to accept it. At 7 years old he said "God, I will not believe in you until I meet my mother." When he was 18 years old, he got a letter and a picture from his mom and walked to Mexico to meet her where he wept and finally accepted Christ. He now works with kids in gangs and he walks the streets of Managua and just talks to kids and then brings them to some sort of church camp (I didn't really get that part of the story)

Its warm and muggy here. This morning I woke up to the sounds of birds, but their calls are so different from the ones at home. I am as ready to meet this day as I can be. We're taking a tour of the Casa Bernabe grounds and Managua. I'm excited to see everything.




Reflections:
We talked to one of the translators later in the week and talked about how people are all over the street at night and how it's not like that here at home. They pointed out that at night its a lot cooler, no one is working, and no one has money to go anywhere so they just congregate outside and hang out... Good point....

Also, Jenn dubbed one of the bird calls as the "Iron Man Bird" because its call sounds like Iron Man's arm gun warming up.